God did a thing, and I wanted to share...

Recently, I have been fortunate enough to witness a divine, God appointed plan come to fruition, and it was nothing short of amazing.

For those of you who do not know me, or at least not well, I have a bit of an attitude problem. Like, the kind of problem where you end up getting into a verbal argument with the woman in front of you in the grocery store check out line...or at the park...or the mall play place...anyhow, like I said -- it's a problem. The point is, I'm not the sugary sweet type of person who handles rude people with grace and love like I know I should, especially being that I ascribe to the Christian faith which is kinda all about love. And that is why what has taken place recently has been nothing short of amazing.

The past few weeks, I've been sort of spiritually bombarded with a similar message over and over again; at church, during scripture study, and in my inward, quiet ponderings. The message was loud and clear: just because God wants you to do something doesn't mean it will be easy or even work the first, second, or third time. Sometimes God's plan might not even seem to be working at all. Press forward anyway.

I had related this message back to my book writing endeavors. Sure I hadn't experienced a slam dunk, home run, out of the park best seller yet, but hang in there. Persevere. It'll come -- that is what I gleaned from the message. Little did I know, that wasn't why this message kept coming through to me at all.

This repetitive message swirling around in my brain became of paramount importance as I acted on another thought that came into my heart sometime later -- 'You know that neighbor you heard about in the front of your neighborhood -- the one with stage four cancer? Serve her. Love her. She needs you.'

I didn't know the woman's name and had never met her, but I knew that I was supposed to care for her and was determined to do so. Little did I know how difficult it would be...

There I went, walking up to this woman's house with my gaggle of kids along with another mom friend from my neighborhood. We planned to introduce ourselves and to offer her our assistance if she should ever need it. I expected her to welcome us with open arms and thank us profusely for the kind, neighborly gesture. That...didn't happen.

Instead, we rang the doorbell, waited for what felt like an eternity only to be greeted by this woman -- whom I was just so sure I was supposed to serve, love and get to know -- in an extremely cold and hostile manner. The door opened, her nose rose in the air, and she said, "Now is not a good time," her voice lined with irritation and disgust at our very presence it seemed before the door was abruptly shut again without another word.

I could tell my neighbor friend was taken aback by the rude reception, but not me. I walked away with a smile on my face, like, 'Alright. Challenge accepted.' And honestly, normally I would have felt like my friend; I would have thought, 'Well, we tried, and she was mean. Oh well.' But I couldn't have even felt that way if I wanted to.

Why? Because God had been preparing this little stony heart of mine for this for weeks. He had let me know He would be asking something of me that might not seem to work out right away, or even after many tries, but that I shouldn't get discouraged -- He had my back, and I needed to persevere.
So what did I do? Instead of pulling a typical Laura move, inwardly swearing to never step foot on that rude lady's property ever again, I went back a few days later. I went prepared, note in hand with my husband's and my phone number written on it, determined to give it to her and, again, offer our sincere help should she ever need it.

I wasn't as hopeful as the first go-round. I went there expecting her to be rude, and she didn't disappoint. I knew it was dinner time, but I also knew with stage four cancer and living alone, there was very little chance she would be eating. So off I went, walking to her house at 6:30 pm, prepared for a fight, and she gave it.

Instead of my fear that she'd shout at me for coming at dinner time, she answered the door fighting mad, saying, "Who in the HECK comes knocking on someone's door at 7 o'clock in the morning?!?"

My heartstrings tugged as I looked at this little, frail, angry woman who was so very sick and confused that she thought it was the morning rather than evening time.

In a small voice, I said, "It's 6:39 at night, Ma'am."

That stopped her short but only for a moment. Determined to hold onto her frustration, she shouted back, "It doesn't matter!"

Having been prepared for this moment for over two weeks, I did the most un-Laura thing ever. I begged her, saying, "Please, I tried to come by before. My family and I really want to help you. We live just there, a short walk away. Here's our number in case you need anything."

Now, I'm not going to lie and say she did a full 180, but it was at least a 155. Without boring you with the whole conversation that will forever be burned into my memory, I will just say, we left things off shaking hands, smiling and knowing one another's names. She said she actually could use help from time to time and took my number.

I know it wasn't a major breakthrough, but this woman doesn't have much time left in this world. And "Laura without the gospel" would have let her cold reception the first time deter me from ever coming back. Truthfully, "Laura without the gospel" would have never gone there in the first place. But "Laura + the gospel" was able to make a connection, however small, and had a true moment with a woman that is in desperate need of love. She lives alone and has a pill waiting for use for when she might decide she is ready to leave this world. Her days are numbered, and I feel honored to be asked to serve her, even if it is hard. Even if it isn't easy.

I want to add that I was hesitant to share this in fear that I was doing it with the wrong motive. Sometimes I don't know myself and my own motives, as weird as that sounds. 'Did I want to share this experience in order to brag? Was I trying to lift up my name as this great person who does these great things?'

I hope that is not my motive. The only names that should be lifted up are those of my Heavenly Father and Savior, Jesus Christ. I am nothing without them. I would have struggled with feelings of anger and hate towards this woman without their helping me along prior to our interaction. I know it is them doing this. I am the mean lady shouting at the other mean lady in the grocery store without them. It is Christ in me that produces fruit of this nature. I am well aware of that.

What a great God we serve. What a blessing it is to be able to be used by Him. There truly is no greater joy. And believe me when I say, I've searched high and low for other sources of joy. Nothing else can compare.

Come unto Christ and be perfected in Him. I need it. You need it. We all do. And it is a marvelous thing to behold.

Be blessed and thanks for reading. <3